A week from today, Trevor and I will be driving to San Antonio for the weekend to celebrate our 10 year anniversary. Ten years. It doesn't seem that long, but I can't deny the facts. At this time 10 years ago, I was tying up loose ends regarding the wedding and Trevor was making plans to drive home from Virginia with his best friend Phil.
Trevor and I have known each other for almost 22 years. We met in Jr. High band in 1985 and have been friends (with a few bumps in the road) ever since. We went through high school together and then I went to college and Trevor joined the Navy. Over the years, we still remained friends and even tried dating a time or two but it never seemed to work out. He would come home on leave for Christmas or some other holiday, and we would get together for a dinner and a movie, or I would go out to his parents house for a visit.
He came home in December of 1996 and we met for our usual dinner and catch up time. We were both involved with other people, but both of those relationships were coming to an end for various reasons. I vividly remember sitting across from him at The Black-Eyed Pea and feeling like I had been struck by lightning. I realized at that moment that I had been so blind to the fact that he was my soul mate and I felt a rush of regret that I had not seen it sooner. Retrospectively, we would have never made it if we had married sooner. We we were both too selfish and immature to even consider the covenant relationship of marriage. God knew the right time and place for the two of us to come to together and it happened exactly as He intended it.
Over the next few weeks we spent obscene amounts of time on the phone with each other and we gave the US Postal Service a run for their money with all of the letter writing that we did! By mid-January we were engaged and Trevor was flying home from Virginia every two weeks to spend the weekend with me. I had a little apartment in the Medical Center and we spent those weekends together remembering the times that we had spent together and planning for our future. I look back on those hastily snatched days together as some of the best memories of my life. I remember asking Mama how she kept the intense feeling of love and attraction alive in her marriage over the years. She told me that every marriage goes through highs and lows, but to remember one important thing. She told me to always remember how I felt when I saw Trevor walking towards me down the concourse at the airport as I eagerly awaited the feeling of his embrace. She said that no matter how bad things may get from time to time that if I could recall that feeling of total love and devotion, it would help me get through those difficult times.
I can say with complete honesty that her advice was some of the best she has ever given me. After 10 years together, there have been times when we were simply living from day to day with no real passion. During those times, all I had to do was see him through my minds eye walking towards me with his arms open and that beautiful smile of love and desire on his face. It wasn't a magical cure for our difficult times, but it gave me hope that those intense feelings would resurface and that our marriage would be that much stronger for the challenges we faced together.
Trevor is my best friend. He is the person I want to talk to when I have good news or bad. I turn to him for comfort, support, guidance and unconditional love. We have a mutual respect for each other and a relationship built on complete trust and honesty. When I ask Trevor if I look fat in a dress, I know that he is going to tell me the truth. We don't play those games with each other...it's counterproductive and only causes hurt feelings. I can tell him anything....even my deep, dark secrets that only God has heard.
I thank God on a daily basis for my husband. He is my best friend and the love of my life. I look forward to remaining years that God has given us. Whether it's 1 more year or 30 more years with him, I will love him as much at the end as I did at the beginning.
I am my beloved’s, and my beloved is mine. Song of Solomon 6:3