1. Have you ever found yourself 'in faith' yet bewildered or demoralized? There have definitely been times that I wanted to give up because the situation seemed like too much work and that it would never get better anyway. It was during those times that I devoted myself even more to prayer and a closer, more intimate relationship with God.
2. Do you consider yourself content? Would you describe it as Decidedly Content or Dreamily Content? I think that I am a very content person. Whether it is decidedly or dreamily depends on what area of my life we are talking about. If we are talking about my marriage and children, then dreamily content. All it takes is the thought of one of them to bring a smile to my face and a little thrill to my chest. Other areas such as extended family, some aspects of work and even my current church life would have to be described as decidedly content. I've discovered over the course of my life that things could always be worse, and the only thing to do with a bad situation is to deal with it. Wallowing in self-pity and discontent just makes it worse. This is certainly not say that I don't do my share of ranting and raving about my problems, but usually I just need to vent and then I get over it.
3. If you are not content, are there circumstances that keep you from this feeling? Whoo hoo! I get a Free Parking card on this one....see answer to #2.
4. Have you ever found yourself in a place where you looked back on a period of your Christian walk and believed a great opportunity passed you by? Unfortunately, I'm sure that there were many times over the years that I missed out on a chance to witness or demonstrate the love of Christ because of my own disobedience. I spent many years between high school a having a family of my own actively fighting the urging of the Holy Spirit. I knew I was being rebellious, but I was too deeply entrenched in my own sin and lifestyle to stop. I think of all the relationships that I had and how many times those people were put directly in my path, and I felt unable to witness because of my own sin and the distance that I had put between myself and God.
5. Do you ever believe your faith was stronger in an earlier time in your Christianity and find yourself floundering now? I think that my faith is stronger now than it has ever been. I've had such an awakening over the last 9 months, and it has been amazing.
6. Can you recognize that this season may be one of great preparation instead of a period of "I Was"? I can look back and see that my season of rebellion prepared me for my current season of grace. My own disobedience taught me that no matter what my sin, true repentance always brings me right back to the cross. It has helped me to stifle my own tendency to judge, because I know that without the mercy and grace of God, I could be back in that place in a heartbeat.
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